Friday, April 9, 2010

Losing the same 5 each week

Well... hello there. Why has it been so long? Well life and poor Internet can sometimes get in the way. I have been wanting to write-really I have. I have had many thoughts about my weight, its ups and its downs. I seem to gain and lose the same 5 pounds over and over and over again. For the fact that it is my new normal weight, I can celebrate but enough already! I saw a lady on Oprah and heard her again on the Oprah Sirius radio show who had lost 100 lbs and then gained it all back-that is frightening! I found this quote: You don't drown by falling in the water, you drown by staying in it. This is so true! I ate like I had never heard of a diet at Easter. We were with my family and although it was just one day, my hand was continually in the candy container and I ate whatever I wanted. When I returned back home, it was very challenging because the sugar and fat addict in me wanted to continue the food rampage. I felt angry at myself as I continued to eat things that are not good for me. It is a dangerous game, over eating and then re-losing the weight. To me it is like gambling, you might win a few times but in the end, you will walk away with empty pockets. I am at 183 today. A good weight-nothing wrong with it. I feel and look great. Sad that I have spent the whole week getting here. At my lowest I am at 180. Inevitably when I get there, I start to crave sugar. I begin to hear the whispers of bad advice swirl into my brain. I am determined to continue my quest for good health and a healthy body.
My sister is a tremendous inspiration. She is taller than I but shared that she is happily in the 160's. She runs every day and has completed a triathlon. Although I don't feel the need to compete athletically, I know that exercise needs to be a part of my life. I want it to feel like a natural part, like putting on socks or brushing teeth. Something to work on.
One last quote: "Your goals, minus your doubts, equal your reality." Ralph Marston